Thursday, April 27, 2006

I Like Your Wife, Just Kidding, Guy.

Before work puts me in a foul mood today (meaning I actually have to do some), I have to tell everyone that my wife and kids were television stars this morning. Leah goes to an exercise class called Stroller Strides. It’s just what it sounds like – mommies exercising with their kids. Hey, that’s why they call them Jogger Strollers. It’s a great group which is actually part of a national chain. They were featured on Channel 4’s Early Morning News this morning in three segments.

Oops, I mean two. The coffee didn’t brew quickly enough and they missed the first one. Granted, Leah got the kids out the door at 6:05am, which is painful just to think about. Plus, she brought hot cocoa and breakfast already made. All I did was dress one and carry two to the car.

To top it off, Leah did it all with a bit of a hangover. She had a "Wells College Function" last night. Read: guiltless excuse to go drinking with girlfriends and lament the fact that men have invaded their alma mater. Leah's friend Kelly is probably the funniest person I know, and she stayed for a bit after driving Leah home last night to regale us with stories of her family:

"Mommy!!! Daddy has a beard around his penis!!!!"

"Mommy!!!! Grace kicked my in the nuts!!!"
"Mommy, I did it because Jake kicked me in the vagina!!!"

"Mommy, I know what the middle finger F-word is."
"Good for you."

Truly, she should write a book.

I, being the good husband and father, stayed awake this morning to see my family on TV. The twins looked stoned and Sammy had a stainless steel coffee mug in his hand.

Oh yeah, and the reporter felt up my wife on live television.

Tomorrow’s Top Story: WIVB Reporter Beaten with Louisville Slugger and Thrown into Grizzly Bear Pen at Buffalo Zoo.