Tuesday, June 05, 2007

You Thought It Was Funny When You Read It Back Then

Leah and I went out for drinks last night. We had a the kids broke in a new babysitter (“but, Mommy, we not babies”). As karma would have it, she is the daughter of my grade school music teacher. The weirdness of that goes beyond description. Will she ever come back? We can only hope.

As we walked out the door, Shrek was screaming, “Donkey, stop following me!” Blank stares at the television screen met us as we walked out, leaving poor Adrienne to fend for herself. Let’s see if you can guess what happened.

Most everyone has read at least one adventure of Rosalyn and her traumatic experiences with Calvin in the cartoon. Welcome to the real life translation of the classic.

Sam, playing the role of the complete innocent, went to sleep without protest, calmly informing on his siblings: “They do this every night. . .”

Noah and Aidan apparently did the Adrienne dance on their beds. And on their floors. And everywhere in between. As the scene was later described to us, after smashing his head against the wall, Noah proceeded to open the makeshift frozen coffee bag ice-pack on his bed, spilling beans everywhere.

Adrienne, rather than calling us to say, “curse you and your devil spawn,” then switched to a bag of frozen green beans.

We arrived home shortly after 10:00pm. God bless the girl, she never called us. Through all the dancing, bed jumping, wall bashing, crying, coffee spilling, and extremely extended bedtimes, she maintained her cool.

She wins.

Postscript – This morning at breakfast, we found out how Noah actually injured himself. During the jumping on the bed, Sam became frustrated because his angelic blond boy act didn’t exactly pay off the way he wanted. So he snuck into his brothers’ room, grabbed the other end of the blanket that Noah held in his teeth, and yanked with all his might, launching Noah head first towards the floor. He then snuck back into his room. This information was volunteered by Sam over breakfast. God help us when he learns to keep his mouth shut.